The end of August has pulled into the station and I’ll be wrapping up the end of five years in my vegan journey. I recently left a job that I dreamed about working in for something like nine years. It was some of the most demanding work in my life, but also at times lived up to the expectations. However short lived it was, my new dream may be to enter into the high turnover workforce, cleaning for the new world of Covid awareness. Possibly I should relocate to Las Vegas. Cleaning seems a bigger and more important part of everything we do and sadly many approved chemical companies are not cruelty-free. While I can keep my apartment further and further away from animal testing, the law is still preventing businesses often from safely operating because of liabilities. People are not understanding when illness hits home and lawsuits with expensive settlements keep the world an unfair place fir animal rights and dedicated vegans.
Vaccines have separated some of us and sometimes or often not for the reasons I’m mentioning. Vaccines have been tested, at least one on the species closest to humans and one I was told has aborted human baby tissue in it. I said I’d rather die in 2020 than use a vaccine that wasn’t cruelty-free, but the reality I faced this year was that I could be a step away from murder or suicide without taking on the responsibility.
So a journey in the awareness one is faced with as a vegan, sometimes as far as not wanting to consume mushrooms, yeast or anything with a single cell culture, is almost always of compromise. It will harden you to back away from the corners of righteousness to fight for your own life. While the rest of the world it seems makes fun of you, ostracizes you and blames you, it still seems impossible to be proud of anything you’ve done or even think to yourself, you’re cool. So we do more to compensate and angrily back out to buy something normal like a comfort drink from my homeless days. I have felt recently like I can’t move on into the sixth year more than ever. The other feeling has been to get a tattoo on my left hand because of the torturous trials I can’t justify and in bargaining with Jesus, it seems we always arrive at an impossible standstill.
Recently I’ve added more characters to our group. One Funko Pop I bid on during my Grandmother’s rememberance service and funeral trip. She’s a pink teddy bear like look from Fortnite called Cuddle Team Leader. Another Funko Pop I won today on eBay is a My Little Pony named Octavia. She has a treble clef tattoo, so I’m guessing she’ll symbolize a turning point in my journey as a musician.
Being in solitude on an overnight schedule, grieving and searching for new opportunities, I’m catching up on some movies, the latest issue of Skin & Ink and ready to draw and practice tattoo. I’m starting to break my writer’s block and longing to travel more than ever. You?